Maria had just gotten married, and being a
traditional Italian she was still a virgin.
On her wedding night, staying at her
mother's house, she was avery nervous.
Her mother reassured her, 'Don't worry, Maria,
Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take
care of you. Meanwhile, I'll be making pasta.'
So, uppa she went. When she got upstairs, Tony
took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest.
Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says, 'Mama,
Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest.'
'Don't worry, Maria,' says the mother, 'all
good men have hairy chests. Go upstairs.
He'll take good care of you.'
So, uppa she went again. When she got up in the
bedroom, Tony took off his pants exposing his
hairy legs. Again, Maria ran downstairs to her mother.
'Mama, Mama, Tony took off his pants and he's got hairy legs!'
'Don't worry! All good men have hairy legs.
Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take
good care of you.'
So, uppa she went again. When she got there,
Tony took off his socks and on his left foot
he was missing three toes. When
Maria saw this, she ran downstairs.
'Mama, Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half!'
Her mama said, 'Stay here and stir the pasta.
