I say we trot out a position player like Kearns and give them a chance, the end result will be the same but at least it will be entertaining. I must I'm very glad I didn't spend $80 on MLBTV this year.
Ever watch Futurama? When the "New New York" Mets "blurnsball" team picks up Leela as a pitcher because she hits every batter and it will draw more fans to the park?
"Mulligan drives the ball. It's going, going and caught by the shortstop. Mets lose again. Man, I haven't seen play this bad since the days of Bob Uecker! This is Bob Uecker, saying thanks for watching!"