Real, actual Nationals lineup:
Kilimanjaro Expedition
(66-43)
2B Steve "Bicycle Repairman" Lombardozzi
RF Bryce "He's Not the Messiah" Harper
3B Ryan "Sir Galahad" Zimmerman
1B Adam "Dinsdale" LaRoche
LF Michael "Beast of Caerbannog" Morse
CF Roger "the Shrubber" Bernadina
SS Danny "Luigi Vercotti" Espinosa
C Jesus "Blessed are the Cheesemakers" Flores
LHP Ross Detwiler
Real, actual Astros lineup:
The Funniest Joke in the World2B Jose "He's from Barcelona, You Know" Altuve
SS Marwin "Dead Bishop" Gonzalez
LF Ben "Fish-Slapping Dance" Francisco
RF Justin "Two Lumps" Maxwell
1B Steve "Whizzo Butter" Pearce
3B Matt "How to Not Be Seen" Downs
CF Brandon "Two Sheds" Barnes
C Chris "I Want You All to Call Me Loretta" Snyder
RHP Jordan Lyles